I love buying second hand, but I draw a hard line at buying used sex toys because it is a cess pool for infection, disease, and all around nasty coochie stank. I know that your poonanie is more funky than fresh, and I am not trying to marry our juices together in a grotty mystery mixture.

Porous Material is a Killer

Sex toys are typically made of porous material, and Rebecca Nelken, MD, a Los Angeles-based, double board-certified OBGYN and pelvic surgeon, explains that it is impossible to know if the toy has been fully disinfected.

Any sex toy, whether it is inserted into a hole or not, must always be purchased new, Nelken said. 

While many people happily snag pre-loved underwear and lingerie from thrift stores (because apparently nothing says "bargain hunter" like stained and torn undies), it's surprisingly less taboo since fabric can be bleached to oblivion and back. After all, nothing says "clean slate" like 99% germ annihilation.

However, sex toys require the kind of meticulous cleaning that would make a surgeon jealous, and even then, there's still the possibility of passing bodily fluids, germs, and other genital infections from person to person. 

What to Know Before Purchasing

This information will be a deterrent from most people buying a vibrator secondhand, however, I know that my horny little readers are still foaming at the mouth, and are ready to fuck literally anything. You’re probably fucking a bag of warm beans stuffed between your couch cushions as you’re reading this, and that’s valid. Here are some things to consider if you’re ignoring previous advice and buying a used sex toy anyway:

• Glass, silicone, and stainless toys are generally safer than toys made from porous materials. Use hot water and unscented soap to scrub away any residue on the surface of the used toy. Dab isopropyl alcohol or bleach to kill any germs. Most importantly, research what the toy is made of because these sanitation techniques are not universal for all materials.

• Buy from a brand that specializes in selling used sex toys because eBay seller “Big Dick Johnny” probably won’t have the same cleaning protocol and standards that trusted companies follow. 

• Ask questions! If your friend is giving you their old vibrator and you're unsure if you want to oblige, it is perfectly ok to ask questions and think critically about your decision. If your friend is kind of a slut, then maybe you don’t want their whore juices sloshing with yours. But if they're a one time user who's practically neurotic about cleaning every microscopic detail, then take the toy at your own risk.

Is Cleaning Good Enough?

In all realness, it is in your best interest to not purchase a used sex toy. A study conducted by Anderson et al. to analyze HPV on vaginally inserted sex toys, found that even after 24 hours of standard cleaning, HPV was still found on toys. 

Your muff will be musty, but that’s on you man. If you opt for some used sex toys, be cautious, think critically, and do your research before purchasing. Don’t come crying to me when green discharge starts spewing out your ears, eyes, mouth, and vagina and you turn into a walking HPV monster. 

For more fun imagery on HPV monsters, dildos, penis sleeves, and anything else sex related make sure to check out ToyChats.com, your playbook to pleasure.