BIG SHOCKED Busty Butt: This Amazon find is shockingly good

Design

To be optimistic, the product looks better than I'd expect for this price tag. Realistically, it looks aiite - but you're not buying this for the realism anyway. The bulk of the toy has a relatively realistic skin color, but the pink painted on vagina looks more like a watermelon Starburst than any lady bits I've seen (both in the movies and IRL). The colors just don't blend nicely, but the labia, clit, etc. are molded nicely. But again, you're not looking at the orifice when you're pumping away. As mentioned, the measurements aren't 1:1, but you'll still be able to grab a decent handful in whatever position you're in.

Experience

Fun fun fun fun fun. This toy feels fun. The vibration function offers a wide range of intensities, from gentle pulsations to powerful throbs. You can customize the vibration patterns to suit your preferences, whether you prefer a gentle massage or a more intense stimulation. The suction function is equally impressive. The strong suction pulls you in, creating a deep, satisfying sensation. The suction power can be adjusted to your liking, allowing you to control the intensity of the experience. With a combination of the two, I found myself just standing there and letting the toy work its magic. Lemme tell you - hands free masturbation is a real game changer. The buttons kinda suck though. They just cycle through the different modes, so you have to click a bajillion times until you find the one you like. That being said, all the modes I've tried have kicked ass. The tunnel itself is advertised as 6.2 inches deep - I haven't taken any measurements, but whatever it is, I'd like more. I'm sure as hell not packin like your friendly neighborhood doctor/plumber/fireman Johnny Sins over here, but I found myself pushing up against the end of the line. I didn't love this. I like to sink real deep in when I'm about to bust, and nothing feels worse than not having an escape route for my swimmers. The internal texture is nice, with bumps and ridges that aren't overstimulating, but also very apparent. There's only one tunnel in this toy though - I guess they needed space for the vibrator and sucking mechanism. I absolutely love the form factor. Sure, it's not the biggest gyat on the streets, but it's satisfyingly squishy to squeeze up against. The weight really provides a more fulfilling experience, and you can play with it in different positions to switch up the fun. In doggy and missionary, you don't even really need to hold on to the toy - again, hands-free is just *chefs kiss*. Cowgirl is equally fun, especially with the suction features.

Quality

This toy is pretty squarely average "Ships from Amazon Warehouse" quality. It's decent overall. The material is somewhat oily/greasy, but it's not like it gets all over your sheets. Just leaves a weird feeling on your hands. I don't have much experience with TPE torso toys, but from what I hear that's actually a pretty standard occurrence across the board. I took a tip from the Fleshlight care guide and powdered it up with some cornstarch - absolutely the right call, as it made the skin feel smoother, softer, and more supple. It's more or less a chunk of TPE, which is fun to hold but just doesn't have the same squish-factor as a real booty. That's fine though, this thing was only $60. The vibrator and suction mechanics do feel like a high-quality thoughtful build. Both sensations really do engulf your whole head and shaft, rather than buzzing out from a specific hotspot in the toy. They're also not overpowering like some other toys - it didn't leave me feeling like I stuck myself in a vacuum cleaner hose, and the vibrations added to the experience rather than act as the forefront of attention.

Packaging

The Busty Butt shipped from Amazon, and it arrived in a pretty standard Amazon Prime labeled box. Super discrete, absolutely nothing that said "HEY EVERYONE LOOK THIS GUYS ABOUT TO JACK OFF". Inside the Amazon box was another (mostly unlabeled) black cardboard box. I don't actually like how other toys plaster images of the product all around the box that's just going to end up in my apartment building's dumpster - I think everyone should just go with a simple black box. It came with a little tube of lube too, but I haven't tried it out yet.

Price

The Busty Butt comes in at a whole 60 smackaroonies, with free one or two day shipping if you have Prime. For what you're getting here, that's some serious value. Do yourself a favor and add some of those Diatom Drying Sticks to the Amazon cart - don't know why I haven't bought those before, but they're worthy of a whole separate review themselves.