Bring The Spark Back to Your Play Time, Literally: The KinkStore Electro Zapper 2.0 Review

I thought I was ready for this. Holy shit, I was not ready for this. I'm not stranger to electroplay—nipple clamps, buttplugs, even a little rod that you insert into your urethra then zap some current into—I've tried them all. But nothing prepared me for this.

The Kink Zapper 2.0 is a feast for the dark senses, with a short, sharp, painful shock, accompanied by a very audible zap, and a visible spark. It's an instrument of pure torture, and if you're into that sort of thing, a bloody brilliant one.

Safety

First things first, let's talk about safety, because THOUSANDS OF VOLTS sounds awfully scary, especially when I've written it in capitals. But to put the Kink Zapper into context, a typical electric fence to keep livestock in runs at anywhere from 10kV to 18kV; those aren’t at all lethal. I have an electric fence, and I can guarantee you that having touched it multiple times, I'm still not dead.

The Kink Zapper 2.0 offers lower levels of intensity, from 1.5kV to 3.5kV, which still sounds scary, but really isn't dangerous. You’ll notice it, squirm and recoil from the shock and pain, and attempt to curse if your Domme didn’t have the forethought to gag you—but there’s no real danger here.

You might also be comparing to the mere 110V from a plug socket, which can kill you. That’s a fraction of the 3500V that the KinkZapper can put out, so one or the other must be lying about their lethality, right?

No, because electrical power is a combination of voltage and current multiplied together. A high voltage alone is not dangerous if there’s little current (as is the case with the Kink Zapper 2.0). A plug socket is lethal because it has both a relatively high voltage and potentially 20 amps of current behind it.

It’s also often said never to play with electro toys of any kind around the heart area, because even the smallest of zaps can cause it to stop entirely or go haywire. Defibrillators—medical devices used to restart the heart—typically operate on a similar voltage to the Kink Zapper 2.0 at about 1kV, but again, with 10s of amps of current, compared to the thousandths of an amp that the KinkZapper 2.0 puts out.

On the other end of the spectrum, low voltage can also be deadly with enough current behind it, though skin blocks lower voltages by acting as a big resistor; you would need to open someone up and apply the low voltage directly to the heart to do any real damage (at which point, they probably have bigger problems).

That is to say you can stop worrying about killing someone with this. You should avoid really sensitive areas, absolutely don't use this internally, and generally follow some common sense. The manual specifically advises against using it if you have a pacemaker, and that seems like solid advice to follow. You just have to look at a pacemaker with the wrong frame of mind, and those little fuckers can break.

However, you may want to consider sudden movements. Your sub is liable to pull, thrash, and generally squiggle around, either to avoid the prongs in the first place or recoil from the shock. If they're restrained—which they really ought to be—you should factor in that movement and ensure it won't tighten or cut off circulation.

Iconic Design

The visuals start with the design of the Zapper, and anyone who's seen it in use during various Kink.com scenes over the years will immediately recognize the iconic red protrusion from the handheld wand.

The total length of the wand is 15 inches, with a battery compartment at one end and two metal loops on the other. The controls are both simple and confusing, with a three-way switch to select the power level. The position closest to you is the strongest, and furthest away is the weakest—though counterintuitively, it's the lowest setting that seems to produce more of a visual zap and less pain.

Finally, there's a button to activate. When the red light on the side is lit, it's charged and ready.

I say "charged", because technically you're charging some capacitors, which then release the stored energy in a rather dramatic fashion when contact is made between the pins, but the charging process is immediate; it's not like you have to wait five seconds. It also continuously recharges if you keep the button held down, so you can queue multiple quick-fire zaps if you're feeling particularly nasty.

My only slight annoyance is the battery compartment. It uses two AA batteries (supplied), but I couldn't find any indication of the orientation these should be placed in. The fact that there are two springs inside implies both negative ends should go in, but after a little experimentation, it's actually negative in first, then positive, from left to right if you're looking at it with the switch held upwards.

A simple indented or printed mark on the compartment would have removed any thoughts that this was broken on arrival. So, if at first nothing happens, change the direction of one of the batteries.

What's It Like?

Mistress grabbed the biggest gag she could find; she didn't want to hear any of my screams. For good measure, she added a padded isolation hood, too. I wouldn't see where anything was coming from, every shock came as a surprise. She secured a full body harness, with the crotch strap ensuring the inflatable butt plug wasn't going anywhere. My hands were strung up above me, trussed up, and on tippy toes. My cock was caged, too. This was not a session of pleasure or release for me. It was merely one of amusement for her.

As the first electrical bite came, I cried out soundlessly. She'd started on the meaty bit of my ass. I bit down hard on the silicon ball and readied myself for the next. They came relentlessly.

I won't lie: I could smell burning hair at times. Even if the original point of contact doesn't connect across a hair, the large spark that's generated will incinerate one. Burning hair isn't the biggest turn-on, I'll admit, but it does add to the general smorgasboard of sensual assault that the Kink Zapper 2.0 offers.

This isn't a toy I would recommend everyone go out and buy; it's absolutely not for beginners. It's simultaneously not dangerous, but painful nonetheless, in a short-lived and highly specific way, like a pin-prick with no chance of piercing the skin. It's a static shock on demand, basically.

If you have a sado/masochist streak, it's a powerful, iconic tool, and a must-buy for your toy chest.