CalExotics Bullet Review: I'd Take This Bullet For You Any Day ;P

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Overall Rating
3.67/5
Product Design
3.5/5
Ease of use
5.0/5
3.2/5
Sensory Quality
3.0/5
Ease of Cleaning
  • Price
    1.7/5
  • Noise
    4.5/5
Keyword
My verdict
Ironically this Bullet is hit or miss, and it has nothing to do with aim. CalExotics' Bullet is pretty great when it works, but getting it to work seems almost as fickle as getting the Blush Lipstick to work. The device is remote controlled, each device requiring a AAA to work, and features 12 settings (mix of vibrations and patterns). Unlike Iroha, CalExotics was not kind enough to include any batteries, so make sure you have some on hand. The Bullet can be fully inserted in either desired entry point and can be easily retrieved with the cord attached to the one end. The device is almost silent to others once inserted which could make it interesting for public use. The remote allows for easy use on your own or with a partner as it can be used up to 32.75 ft (10m) away. No IPX rating given, but it does claim to be usable in and out of water. No use time is given for this device, and given the weird events during testing I'm not even sure how to guess at a proper length so 60 minutes was my overall guesstimate. Can be a great toy for first time users, and can be fun for public/private partner play.
Pros
Features 12 settings, 3 vibrations and 9 patterns, so you can mix it up however you'd like! ;P
Controllable via remote from up to 32.75ft/10m away. Great for single/partner play in public/private
Virtually silent to others when inserted, making it private/public play all that more enjoyable. ;P
No IPX rating given, but claims to be usable in water. Bath time just got a little edgier ;P
Easy travel companion due to small discrete design.
Cons
Does NOT come with any batteries, make sure to have some on hand before using!
Not 100% if it seems to quickly drain batteries, has finnicky circuitry, or I'm using iffy batteries
Use a toothpick or finger nails to clean the ribs as a simple wash will NOT fully clean them out.
No carrying pouch included with the item. Keeps the item clean, hidden, and is easier to travel with
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Experience

Much like the Blush Lipstick, this was a mixed experience.

My battery charger says my batteries are good to go, but the device says "uh no" and I'm not quite sure who to believe...

I put a pair of rechargeable batteries in the device that got the green light but the device refused to turn on. I threw the batteries back on the charger despite the light being green and left them on a few more minutes and tried again. It was weird that the third time was the charm but nothing was done differently.

When I finally got it to work for an actual test it was quite enjoyable and surprisingly quiet, but trying to figure out why it doesn't want to work sometimes is bugging me. I was cycling through the settings at one point to see what it could handle and two full cycle throughs, less than 30 seconds between each change, seemed to have killed it, but the batteries were still green when I put them on the charger.

Right now it's making a liar out of me because it's working just fine lol. If it continues to actually work, I'd happily say this is a decent little device and due to its versatility I would definitely consider adding it to the seemingly expanding group of small travel devices.

Packaging

CalExotics was kind enough to send the product in a discreet white bag so it wasn't obvious to everyone around that there's something naughty in the box. The kindness stopped there when they decided not include batteries or a carrying pouch but I digress lol.

The design for this box is a simple four tone, partially open faced look. The front features a window that showcases the product itself, the company name, the product name, three bullets of quick information and an icon showing that it's battery operated. The back portrays a picture of the product, the name of the product, 6 bits of information in a presentation format around the product, 6 more bullets of information off to the side, and a chunk of technical jargon that people would ignore like it's the "Terms of Service". One side of the product is open faced with the product name, while the other also depicts the company name and shares some product information in 4 other languages.

The colors and pattern have an almost retro feel to them, but I like how simplistic but informative the whole presentation of the packaging is. Though I'm still not all that comfortable with admitting I now have a growing collection of sex toys, I feel this type of packaging would be among the few styles I've come across that would encompass that next step/level of being comfortable with my outer appearance of sexuality. I believe this is mostly due to the mild nature of the product itself as it's not phallic or overly sexual in any manner, essentially I'd much rather this be on display than the CalExotic's Jack Rabbit lol.

What's in the Box?!

Inside the package: The product itself, the remote, an instruction pamphlet, signed operating instructions, and a signed EU-Type Examination (Module B) Certificate.

Gotta love knowing the name of the guy that tested the radio device in the product, thanks Gordan A and Wayne Hsu! It would have been nice to see a carrying case included with this product, but CalExotics seems to be all about letting things hangout as they are lol. They are kind enough to allow the package to arrive discretely but after that you're on your own! And get your own batteries while you're at it! :P

Lipstick vs Ume-Anzu vs Bullet

Material - Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu wins, the whole thing is soft and nice to touch!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - Hygienically superior silicone
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - Elastomer and ABS
  3. Blush Lipstick - A satin like lipstick tip and ABS casing

Waterproof Settings - Tie between Bullet and Ume-Anzu!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - No official rating listed but can be used under water!
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - No official rating listed but can be used under water!
  3. Blush Lipstick - No official rating listed, claims it's waterproof but design doesn't look or feel like it would be.

Run Time - Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu wins for sure consistency and actual listed time!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - Doesn't specify, was finicky during initial testing but currently fine.
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - Up to 5 hours
  3. Blush Lipstick - Doesn't specify, but the finicky nature of the device blocks consistent long lengths of use time anyway.

Charging Time - Tie!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - No charge time! Just have at least four rechargeable batteries on hand or a whole pack of regular and enjoy!
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - No charge time! Just have at least two rechargeable batteries on hand or a whole pack of regular and enjoy!
  3. Blush Lipstick - No charge time! Just have at least two rechargeable batteries on hand or a whole pack of regular and enjoy!

Size - Tie!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - Perfect travel companion due to its small stature, easy to store and hide Could be passed off as a key fob.
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - Perfect travel companion due to its small stature, easy to store and hide. Could be passed off as a lip gloss, blush or lotion.
  3. Blush Lipstick - Perfect travel companion due to its small stature, easy to store and hide especially because it looks exactly like a lipstick.

Vibration Settings - CalExotics Bullet wins!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - 12 settings, decent intensity
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - 1 overall setting, but decently intense.
  3. Blush Lipstick - 1 overall setting, but decently intense.

Penetration Ability - CalExotics Bullet wins!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - 3.5" long and fully penetrable.
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - Definitely more of an external stimulator. The shape is not the most penetration friendly style.
  3. Blush Lipstick - The lipstick end allows for 1 inch of penetration, but honestly the whole thing could be inserted if truly desired.

Ease of Use Regarding Vibration Settings - Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu wins!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - 12 vibration settings, Single button operation makes this device super simple to use. Quickly press to turn on and cycle through settings, hold down to power off.
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - 1 vibration setting. Single button operation makes this device super simple to use. It's located on the side and is very reliable.
  3. Blush Lipstick - 1 vibration setting. Opens like a normal lipstick and turns on when fully extended. Is quite finnicky and is oddly a pain to turn on sometimes.

Ease of Use General Sense - CalExotics Bullet wins!

  1. CalExotics Bullet - Ergonomically friendly, great for clitoral stimulation, made for full insertion, easy to operate, easy battery change, somewhat durable design.
  2. Iroha Mini Ume-Anzu - Ergonomically friendly, decently sized but small rounded tip for nice accuracy and surface coverage, not insertion friendly, easy to operate, easy battery change, and durable design.
  3. Blush Lipstick - Ergonomically friendly, small lipstick tip makes it easy to pinpoint that exact spot, insertion friendly, conceptually easy to operate but inconsistent with when the circuit is closed and operational, battery cover is a bit of a pain, and does not feel all that durable.

Overall winner by Personal Preference: CalExotics Bullet wins, so long as it doesn't clonk out and act strange again like it did during testing for videos/pics. If it clonks out again, Ume-Anzu remains the winner as far as my currently owned battery operated toys are concerned.

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About This Author

NotSoInnocent

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I'm genuinely amazed I'm here! Though I can come off very flirty and sometimes talk a big game, when it comes to certain sexual aspects I am actually quite shy, slightly uncomfortable, lacking in confidence and can sometimes be downright prudish lol. My sex life always consisted of my favorite fingers or an actual man. (Shocking I know!) Toys were something I felt would disrupt intimacy or ruin my ability to orgasm without one. Let's face it, a man can't vibrate like a motor can or always keep up with the Energizer Bunny lol. It was actually a recent relationship with vastly different libidos that resulted in the strangest gift of my 1st ever toy: an egg w/ an app and settings created by other users. At first it felt like cheating... Over time, it became a boost to my independence/self-confidence and I realized I needed to learn to love myself in new ways. This is a definitely surprising step in my journey of self exploration, but one that I hope can oddly help others in theirs too!

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