UTIMI Spring Review: Sure to Put a Spring in Your Step!

Not entirely sure how this one got its name or how to make a pun of it. I think I'm going have to write my first non pun filled review right now... *shudder* It's very weird to say since I'm still somewhat of a newcomer myself, but I think this would be a good first time personal massager for someone that doesn't want to commit to getting a dildo just yet but wants a nice somewhat inconspicuous toy. It definitely feels nice as a regular massager, and is quite intense as a clitoral stimulator and with 20 patterns, 8 intensities, a 90-120 min use time and a memory retention feature you can't really go wrong.

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This is a weird little toy. I’ve told you guys before that I judge sex toys by their cover. It’s not something I’m proud of, and I’ve been proven wrong many times. I was hoping to be proven wrong this time, really. I gave it a shot, I promise. Even when I had to go to the store and buy new batteries, I told myself it would be worth it. But this creepy and useless toy was not worth it. I also want to say, I’m all for lifelike dildos with realistic texture and ribbing. But do not dye it primary blue and make it unnecessarily squishy. I don’t have any interest in a soft and blue penis. I don’t like that it’s the same color as a children's toy. You can have lifelike and you can have bright colors, you cannot have them both and expect me to like it. A pastel would have been wonderful and an earth tone would have been even better. I’m not saying it can’t be colorful. I am saying that it cannot look and feel like a children’s slime tube. Aesthetics aside, let's discuss performance. First, it required batteries, but once we got past that annoyance and into playtime it did absolutely nothing for me. It was so soft and gooey. It doesn’t target your G-spot, and the handle is too short to maneuver. And while the veins and ribbing were nice, they were not as stimulating as I’m sure they were meant to be. Plus, the vibrations were “meh.” The only service it really provides is penetration. It’s hard to find something redeeming about this toy.

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The Nova 2 by We-Vibe has officially earned a spot in my nightstand drawer - and trust me, that’s high praise. This rabbit-style vibrator is a dream for both first-timers and seasoned pros alike. It’s designed with flexibility in mind, so it moves with your body instead of against it. And here’s the part that really sold me: the clitoral stimulator actually stays in place the whole time. No fumbling, no repositioning - just consistent, toe-curling contact. The vibes themselves are powerful but discreet, meaning you get all the buzz without the buzzkill of loud noise. Plus, both the internal and external arms are super adaptable, so odds are it’ll suit your body just right.

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Ava's Evo is an elegant version of a massage with a happy ending, as it's guaranteed to relieve stress and tension in more ways than one! ;P Honestly, I would use this more as a personal everyday massager more often than I'd use it as a "personal" massager. That being said this is a pretty awesome product all around. The 20 patterns and 8 intensity levels makes it quite versatile, the clitoral stimulation is top notch, the fact that the head is also penetration friendly is nice, the long handle makes hard to reach places easier to access and it gives excellent massages in general.

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This device looks like an exotically fancy dental device that could be found at Five Below. If the TSA used this to do cavity searches I'd go to an airport more often. This product looks a Bluetooth device with the widest range of reception. All that aside, Dyso's ClimaxTouch is definitely on point with its name and its features. The dual headed aspect, 10 settings per head, swappable tips, penetrative ability, wide range of external stimulation capabilities, and beautiful design make it a pretty desirable product in my opinion. I could easily see it being used both as a foreplay device and full solo mission one. Of the 3 Dyso products I currently own, Dysoflex and Aerolure being the other two, this is the clear winner. If I combined what features I liked about the other two it wouldn't come close to the features of this device that I not only like but would consistently use.

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I want to love the Irohna Zen Matcha so much that it’s hard to come to a verdict. There is a lot to love. The top is super plush, soft silicone that molds to your body and conducts vibrations better than tightly wrapped silicone. Its ridges are a perfect added element of texture, spicing up your session. Plus, those ridges, the bulbous shape, and the color all reference a matcha wand–truly, it’s a toy after my own heart. It’s even my favorite color! The biggest thing it’s missing is one or two more notches of power. The Matcha has 3 intensity settings and one extra pattern, so it goes low, medium, high, then pattern. It toes the line, but it’s missing that knockout punch. It’s also a battery operated vibrator, which is not the end of the world, but rechargeable vibrators are really convenient. Ultimately, it’s a lovely toy. But it just doesn’t have the power you need.

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I have to say, the Satisfyer Pro 2 Modern Blossom surprised me in the best way possible. It's pricier than my beginner purchases, but the quality difference is very noticeable. I’ve never tried suction toys before and I’ve heard negative sentiments about it but I’m glad I did not let that stop me from giving it a try. It just creates a completely different sensation compared to traditional vibrators, which has allowed me to explore new positions and techniques I hadn't considered before. What really stands out is the intensity of the experience—the orgasms, I notice, are much stronger and longer-lasting. I'm talking about the kind where you feel pleasant aftershocks for several minutes afterward. There's something quite remarkable about that lingering sensation that my old toys never quite achieved. And let's talk about the design—it's genuinely beautiful. The rose aesthetic is visually appealing and adds a certain poetic quality to the experience. The durability also sets this device apart from my previous ones. My earlier wand vibrators seemed to work well initially but later, they deteriorated in both power and functionality. The Satisfyer Pro 2 Modern Blossom, however, maintains consistent performance session after session. It's intuitive to use despite some minor interface issues I'll mention later, and the variety of intensity settings lets you discover what works best for you. The compact size also makes it less intimidating than some larger, more complex options on the market. For anyone looking for a reliable, well-made suction toy that won't break the bank, this is definitely worth considering.

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I love this little vibrator! The Virgo Mini Vibe had just enough kick, at the right price, to be a perfect addition to your toy collection. I love that the Virgo Mini Vibe is shaped like a woman, (a virgin), to resemble the meaning of the zodiac sign, "Virgo,". I am a Virgo and was born September 13, and I just love that this toy comes from an entire collection of toys, curated to fit your zodiac sign. It's quiet enough to be sneaky in public, charges quickly, and is small enough to fit right in your purse, or bag, etc. The silicon is high quality, medical grade silicon. And the price, for what you get can't be beat. I couldn't find a lot of instructions online, or see how long it actually takes to charge or how long the battery life is, but I have only charged it once, for about an hour, and it has lasted a couple uses at this point. The only issue I have with this toy is that the vibrations are not as strong as I would prefer, and therefore, I am giving this toy a 4/5.

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