Ever fantasized about taking command in the bedroom?

Or, of being commanded? Of course you have, who hasn’t?

The Captain sex position is a beautiful first step in your journey through power play. It isn’t your run-of-the-mill sex position—this is a position designed for dominance, eroticism, and total control of yourself and your partner.

Don’t get spooked by all this adventure talk! Not all sex positions are one-size-fits-all, but almost anyone can pull off the Captain with ease.

So, strap on your Captain’s hats and let’s chart a course for pleasurable waters.

What is the Captain Sex Position?

The Captain sex position is a simple, commanding variation of missionary. It combines elements of deeper penetration, power play, and authoritative body language, culminating in a kinky way to rock the boat.

The Captain position asks the receiver to lie on their back, legs extended upward and spread—the penetrating partner kneels, letting their knees splay wide as they sink closer to the bed.

Both the giver's and receiver’s hands remain free to roam. It’s the perfect opportunity for the receiver to use a toy or their hand to add a dimension of pleasure. The giver can grab hold of the receiver’s thighs, commanding their body like a ship in a storm.

Ultimately, the “Captain” gets its name because the partner on top is in complete control of speed, power, and angle.

Want to slow things down and get back to the basics? The ABCs of Sex is a cute and informative breakdown of the foundations of intimacy.

How to Get Into the Captain Sex Position

Sail into the Captain sex position smoothly by following a few simple steps:

1. Choose your surface – The key to this sex position is having the receiver’s body at a 90-degree angle, legs extended upward. A sturdy surface is essential, but not necessary. A bed works best in my experience, but you can opt for a sofa, desk, or the floor (use cushions if you choose the floor).

2. Set the scene, gather supplies – If you’re digging the nautical theme, keep it going. Grab a Captain’s hat, keep your boots on, or lace up lingerie that’ll have them walking the plank. Or, skip the role play, but do not forget the toys. The penetrating partner might be in control of what they’re packing, but the receiver has full use of their hands. Clitoral stimulators are excellent additions to this versatile sex position. My personal favorite, my ride or die vibrator, is the Bellesa Pebble. And it’s perfect for this position. If that’s not your cup of tea, look through our vibrator reviews. The Toy Chats team has personally tested and reviewed hundreds of vibrators so you don’t have to.

3. Position the first mate – The receiving partner lies flat on their back, knees bent or extended—option to fully extend the legs once the giver is in position, using them to help support. Option here to add a butt plug to the mix. If you’ve ever considered it but felt a little weird saying that desire out loud, take a look at our article Why Women Are Buying More Butt Plugs. Backdoor play is losing its taboo; there’s no need to feel shame around any pleasure.

4. Take the captain’s seat – The penetrating partner kneels in front of the receiver, knees going wide to create a low, strong base. Grabbing onto the receiver’s ankles or calves, the giver spreads their legs and enters.

5. Take control – What sets this position apart from tamer versions is the hunger and control of the giver. They can lean forward, changing the angle of penetration. They can lift the receiver’s hips onto their lap, deepening their reach. Speed up, slow down. Tease, taunt. Watch their eyes roll back and toes curl. The options are endless.

Ever wondered why lovers bite? What used to be a nibble while kissing has turned into leaving marks on flesh, learn more about Biting During Sex: A New Kink.

What’s to Love About the Captain Sex Position

The Captain position isn’t just about being in charge—it’s about blending power, intimacy, trust, and desire to experience a connection unique to you and your partner.

Let’s break down why adventure seekers can’t get enough of the Captain position:

Command and Control – The partner on top gets to dictate rhythm, pace, and depth, giving them complete control of penetration. On the other hand, the receiver retains full control of their external pleasure, an area where they’re often the expert.

Intimacy and Connection – Yes, the Captain can dominate. The Captain can also worship. This sex position is primed for deep eye contact and constant touch. Power play can go both ways; the top partner can dominate or caress, it’s up to them.

Deep Penetration – The Captain allows for naturally deeper thrusts, especially if the receiver tilts their hips upward or places a pillow under them.