
Age: 38
Gender: Male
A little about me - I've been a part of the kink community doing illustrations under the username smutlines on Instagram for the last 5 years. Recently I've found myself with a heap of toys and I thought why not review some of them and let you all know what I think.
- Reviews(27)
- Comments(24)
Penis Toys5.00Pontus - Diatomite Dry Stick Review. For when you need a dry sleeve, and quick!
After a long session with your favourite porn star pussy, the last thing on your mind is, “Damn, now I need to clean her out and make sure she’s dry.” That’s where the Pontus Diatomite Dry Stick steps in. Thanks to its naturally porous structure and excellent absorbent properties, it helps remove moisture from inside your sleeve after cleaning. It’s the perfect little accessory for removing leftover dampness, with the added bonus of helping to reduce odours. Even better, at such a dirt-cheap price, it’s an absolute no-brainer for anyone wanting to maximise the lifespan of their favourite toy.
Penis Toys4.38Fleshlight Boost Blow Review: Best Sleeve Yet
The Fleshlight Boost range of masturbators is a new pillar in the companies range with significant differences compared to the standard offerings which include a pair of internal suspended rings and innovative new suction control method. For the mouth option in particular, the level of detail presented here goes above and beyond a simple pair of lips, instead you're treated to details like a floating tongue, prominent teeth and uvula - Pairing perfectly for those with blowjob fantasies! Overall, I found this sleeve hits almost all the right spots. It's engaging, has new and interesting design features, and is suitable for both teasing and longer edging sessions particularly given the canal is so varied in texture. One minute your head is playfully teased by the teeth and tongue, the next your balls deep with the sleeve pressing against your shaft. It's wicked fun! There were really only a couple of small faults holding it back which unfortunately included the feature rings. The rings were stimulating and applied some pressure to the shaft, however personally I wish they were tighter. Additionally I felt the amount of lube required bordered on excessive, the boost is definitely a hog in that regard. Overall though, the faults were minor and are easy to get past and the sleeve as as whole is a great addition to your collection.
BDSM4.75Dorcel Discreet Box Review. A box to store your things.
If you're like me, occasionally you need to get out and about and you need to have a safe place to store some of your toys while in transit. Thankfully products like the Dorcel - Discreet Box exist which not only help keep your toys, lubes and charging cords organised but it also keeps them nice and clean, especially for toys that don't include storage bags with their purchase. While I would have appreciated a slightly larger internal area, the Discreet Box has enough space for an overnight trip or weekend away. A standout feature is the combination lock on the front of the bag, a necessity to keep prying eyes out while you're out on your sexual misadventures and one that I use all the time. There's not worse sinking feeling than your more vanilla friends finding a wayward sex toy that you accidently left out after cleaning... Overall despite its smaller size, the Dorcell - Discreet box provides sufficient storage space for multiple personal toys in a neat but otherwise discreet exterior.
Penis Toys4.53Fleshlight Hot Shots Mia Malkova Review: This Surprised Me!
This originally was going to be a review saying how much I hated this toy and all the negative things that I didn't like...Instead, with a better mindset, I went back, re-tested and reviewed the Quickshot, and ultimately re-wrote the entire review. The Mia Malkova Quickshot differs from its full sized versions being only about 4 inches long and is a compact reinterpretation of the textures in the full sized units. It offers a versatile, engaging experience that despite some flaws keeps pace with the full sized versions, and in some ways exceeds them. Overall its a product that I can get behind and particularly at its cheap price, really recommend.
Penis Toys4.58Lovense Solace Pro Review. Let the machine uprising begin!
If you’ve been following my reviews for a while, you’ll know that I have a definite soft spot for the techier side of the adult toy industry. If it’s got a motor, app integration, or some form of smart connectivity, you can bet I want to get my junk into it. So you can imagine my excitement when the Lovense Solace Pro landed on my desk. A truly hands free masturbator that has a fast stroke speed and is kitted out with the latest in AI syncing and from the moment I opened the box everything about this screamed PREMIUM. The feel of the sleeve, the ability to truly customise strokes, and online functionality really hit home how high end the Solace Pro really was. This is a device that doesn’t just promise a good time, it delivers it in spades. The sleeve also stood out with its soft, skin-like texture and subtle internal detailing that struck the perfect balance between stimulation and comfort. That's not to say it was all sunshine and rainbows, there were occasional faults with the AI not syncing which left me limp as I trouble shooted and tried to get it up and running again and the packaged sleeve while great lacks suction control. Despite these mis-steps, the Solace Pro is a full featured package that really just wants you to strap in and take you for a ride...and what a ride it is.
Penis Toys4.50Kiiroo Limited Edition FeelGlow Review- The Glow in the Dark Masturbator
Sex toys that glow in the dark - what could be a better combo? Introducing the Feel Glow masturbator from Kiiroo! When I saw this unit I just couldn't say no and the novelty of a glow in the dark stroker was just too cool to refuse. Unfortunately I wish the sensations experienced matched my enthusiasm while charging it up. It's not to say that its a bad toy, or even that it wasn't satisfying. It's just that in a crowded market, if you are looking for pleasure, there are better products available. If however your looking for something quiet, something to develop stamina or just something to play with in the bedroom with another. its redeeming qualities could make this the toy for you.
Penis Toys4.63Fleshlight Girls - Emma Magnolia Review: Is This Royalty!?
Ranked No.1 on Fleshassist and generally reviewed highly, the Emma Magnolia Regal sleeve is a realistic, nubby little number that's made with a fantastic entry! The Regal texture on its own feels amazing and was one that I was really excited to try out, in practice though I found it was unfortunately a little too front heavy for my liking and was mostly let down by the tight and basic centre. Don't get me wrong, its a very enjoyable sleeve in its own right, but when compared to others in my collection, it runs third behind the Eliza Ibarra and Janice Griffith sleeves. At the end of the day though, it really is just personal preference and your experience may differ. Read on to find out what I liked, disliked, and what I felt could be room for improvement.
Penis Toys4.63The Firmtech - Max Performance Ring.
The Max Performance Ring from Firmtech is a stretchy, elastic cock ring that uses an innovative clasp to wrap around your balls and over the top of the penis to restrict blood flow for a stronger and longer lasting erection. While this can be used for everyday sex, it is marketed more towards those with ED, so while you will get a bump in hardness and performance if your fit and active, actual performance may vary depending on your personal situation. At a minimum, the Max Performance Ring is a comfortable cock ring that does almost all the right things however its held back by a couple of small QC issues and its high price tag ($60 USD).
Penis Toys4.88OXBALLS - Trisport XL Review. A sling / ring combo that will keep you hard.
I still remember seeing OX Balls products when I first started visiting adult stores, they had always looked a bit daunting and I never too the plunge. Now that I've had the opportunity to give this one a go I wish I had taken the plunge sooner! Don't let the looks of this cock ring fool you, its incredibly comfortable, stretchy and well worth the price. While the chunky feel may not be for everyone, personally I found when your feeling your balls pulled down from your body, your kept rock hard and the veins in your member are popping out its a sight to behold.
Penis Toys5.00Lovense Gush 2 Review - Holy F-balls...this thing just gave me a hands free orgasm!
After extensive testing of various automated strokers and things you put your junk into, I think I've finally found a toy that can achieve the elusive hands free orgasm! I mean you will still need you hands to get it in place and attach some straps but once that's done, just put on your favourite movie and let the Gush 2 take you to orgasm town. Let's just say this thing is a pretty amazing piece of kit.
Penis Toys4.55Momonii Skullman Review from Beyourlover toys - Do you want to F-me punk?
Let’s be honest - sex toys for guys can be a bit uninspired. Most fall into the usual categories: strokers shaped like flashlights, anal toys that all feel eerily similar, or yet another variation from Tenga. Sure, the designs may differ slightly, but unless you’re diving into the high-end, bespoke market, variety is pretty limited. But every now and then, something truly different comes along—something affordable and fun. Enter the Momonii Skull Man: an automatic thrusting and vibrating toy with LED eyes and a personality all its own. It’s quirky, it’s wild, and surprisingly, it doesn’t break the bank. Of course, it’s not without its flaws—but we’ll get into all of that in the full review below.
Penis Toys4.75Kiiroo FeelStars - Agatha Vega Masturbator Review. This Thing is BEW-DI-FUL!
Now this is going to go over the heads of anyone who didn't grow up in Australia in the late 80's and early 90's, but in the words of Con the Fruiterer - this toy is BEW-DI-FUL. Seriously I mean it, Kiiroo knocked this one out of the park! The material is soft but with enough heft to not feel cheap and the sculpt is amazing, displaying a level of detail I haven't seen in a stroker before. If Kiiroo keep this up, I think they may become my preferred manufacturer for porn star toys. There were a couple of small issues however, including a tear that appeared in the opening but overall this is a fun sleeve that will provide you with plenty of enjoyment.
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