Swan Sceptre Review: Will Really Shift Your Gears!

This review is brought to you by FunnyMee! They sent me the Rose and Sani to review, you should check out their website if you get a chance. You can also get 10% off either of these toys with my discount link: https://tinyurl.com/yveaafbe . . . Licking toys are just so difficult to get right!--the human tongue when performing oral sex on a vagina isn't just shallow oscillating movements that seemingly all sex toys do! We need Patrick Star "I can almost taste it now" ice cream licking gif happening. Couple that movement with some vibration and then you'd have a good licking sex toy...In my humble opinion. I actually like the Rose Thrustion a little bit more than my last FunnyMee toy review: the Sani (or Sany). The Rose does have a lot of going on, but doesn't really excel at anything. I think I was slightly hinting at this in my Sani review, but I feel like most people would totally be willing to drop a mid-tier or even a premium price on a really well designed and powerful toy. I think Lovense being so popular is a testament to that idea. The Rose instead opts to try and be a premium toy on a budget-friendly price...which just means they had to pare down and skimp in order to make the $26 price point able to make them a profit. If I were to give my unsolicited advice I would ask for a few things: 1) extending the shaft and adding a longer and a speed adjustable thrusting motion (like Lovense's Gravity) 2) adding a vibration element to the head/shaft and 3) a redesign of the licking element...and all this complaining is out of love...and because it's on the cusp of greatness ~ but not quite there yet.

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The iroha Mini is an excellent size, making it easy to hold in your hand and have hours of fun with. Unfortunately, it's battery-operated and not rechargeable. Still, you can get up to 5 hours of playtime with it before changing the battery. If you like a fast vibe, this will make your day. If not, it is a bit much to handle and you'll want to carefully play around to find the right places to use this massager. It definitely does the trick with a little experimentation and patience.

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The OMG Plaisir can be found on PinkCherry for $70 normally, but is currently on sale for $42 (July 2025). Though it isn't necessarily OMG type pleasure, it is still enjoyable for what it is. Right out the box, I'm ecstatic it comes with a storage/travel pouch. I just opened and reviewed how many toys in this batch and it's essentially the only one to do so lol which is disappointing. I'm disappointed in the lack of a buzzy indicator when the toy is turned on, as I'd prefer that over the hard-to-see/super-easy-to-miss indicator light. I want to be able to insert my toys discreetly in the restroom sometimes and then potentially turn it on once I get comfortable, as it might take me a moment to do so, and why waste the battery while I'm dickstracted by other things going on beforehand?! The charge time being less than the use time may be a downside for other users, not so much me as I'm seemingly easy to please lol. The battery operated remote allows for users to easily switch back and forth between the 10 settings, 3 single vibes and 7 patterns, while the toy itself is a single button operation. The dildo portion is girthy, ribbed and a decent size, while the nubs are interesting but not the best feature I've come across. Overall, I'd use this toy much like I'd use the Evolved Paradise one, for a slow burn finish while watching something action packed or cerebrally witty. For a fast paced, wham bam alone session I'd grab something else first. Due to the features of this one I'd potentially pick it over the Paradise one for a more "realistic" movie/show watching experience lol.

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The Balessa Aurora Soft Touch offers a unique blend of power and gentleness with its memory foam-like, flexible tip. Its 10 quiet vibration modes, waterproof design, and travel lock make it versatile for both internal and external stimulation. Ideal for beginners or those who prefer softer, contouring toys, it provides a gentle yet powerful experience without causing discomfort.

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M’Lady Tiny Vibrating Wand is the perfect mix of funny, adorable, powerful, and effective. It’s so mighty and so small. I can’t get enough of it. Every time I look at it or use it, I have to chuckle. M’Lady is the perfect name; it matches the silliness of this ridiculously cute toy. Enough about the vibe it gives off, let’s talk about the actual vibes because they’re immaculate. Defying the laws of physics, this toy packs a punch. I could see the manufacturer releasing this toy as a gimmick, giving it one or two moderate speeds. But no, M’Lady is powered by Power Bullet. It has 3 speeds and 4 patterns that will knock your socks off. It comes in a precious carrying case, allowing you to hide it in your purse and take it with you for a date night or a short trip. I’m just so thrilled with this itsy, bitsy, teeny, weeny wand.

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Tracy's Dog OG Dual-Vibe is a little something different than what I've played with in the bedroom in the past, but I was pleasantly surprised. It's a remote-controlled toy that can easily be used without the remote. It's a nice, smooth silicone. Unlike some toys, Tracy's Dog tossed three sample packs of lube in the package too, so it's all ready to go once you give it a charge,

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Okay, this toy is something else, in the best way because it's glass and it vibrates. Yes, you read that right, I was genuinely surprised (and a little fascinated) when I first got my hands on it. The sensations it delivers are definitely different from your average silicone vibe. For one, the vibrations lean toward the buzzy side, and the entire 6.5-inch shaft has these shallow indentations that look cool but don’t really add much in terms of texture during use. Once you lube it up, and you absolutely should, it becomes super slick. Like, really slick. (Maybe don’t use this one for butt stuff. It’s a little too easy for it to slip, and no one wants an awkward ER visit on their sex résumé.) That said, the glass material makes it perfect for temperature play. You can run it under warm or cool water before use for a little extra sensory fun, just steer clear of anything too hot, because ouch.

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Whoa. That baby purrs. I don’t know what screw is loose or if it’s a genius classic design, but the vibrations from Bgood Classic purr. That’s the only word for it. It feels almost like there's space between the motor and the walls of the toy, letting the vibrations reverberate through. It makes the vibrations feel deep and sensual. Not to mention, this toy has horsepower. Bgood was not playing around when they made this toy. My only critique would be that I wish it was easier to turn off and that the materials were slightly higher quality. It’s a little on the loud side, which I don’t mind–I live alone, so it’s fine. But it’s strong and loud, and when you’re done, it’s not fun to fumble around. If the materials were higher quality, it might feel more luxurious and have a longer battery life. It has five vibration settings, though the lowest intensity is still pretty strong. Overall, it’s a lot of fun.

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After giving the PlusOne Fluttering Arouser a solid try, I’d say it’s a fun tease. The standout feature for me was the realistic flicking tongue—it’s definitely unique—and thoughtful design comes in a close second. The varied vibration modes and 'licking patterns' are enjoyable, but some of the modes felt a bit repetitive, leaving me bored instead of locked in. That said, with some patience and effort (especially on the higher settings), it can get the job done—so if you want to put in the extra effort you can get to the finish line. The toy scores points for being quiet, easy to handle, and a breeze to clean and care for. I also love its versatility—it’s waterproof, the controls are straightforward, and the charging setup is refreshingly simple (no finger gymnastics required). However, as a standalone clitoral stimulator or vibrator, it doesn’t quite hit the mark for me. It’s more of a teasing, foreplay kind of toy, which worked well during partnered play and alongside other toys. But as a solo act? It falls a bit short in delivering that ultimate satisfaction.

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